I am not a mother, but I hope to be one day. I reflect on the many conversations I want to have and life lessons that I want to teach my kids, especially my son. I envision teaching my son that he is to always respect and value a woman. I envision teaching him how to stand tall and be proud of who he is. I envision teaching him how to be a God-fearing individual and to respect all. I envision instilling in him the value of hard work and striving to be the best that he can be; to work hard in school and take his education seriously. Then, my mind creeps to that dreaded “talk” I will have to give him one day. No, not the “talk” about sex (my husband will be handling this topic) but the “how to survive and make it home as a Black male” talk.
I will have to look at my son and teach him to never run in public, especially with something in his hands because people will think he is stealing. I will have to teach my son that there are certain neighborhoods he can’t be in at night. I will have to teach him if and when he is driving and is pulled over by the police, to simply respond to them “yes, sir’ and “no sir” with both his hands highly visible on the steering wheel. I will have to look at my son and tell him “no matter how great of a kid you are; no matter how wonderful of a student and overall human being you are when you walk out of this house, to some, none of that will matter. To many, you will be viewed as a thug and unfortunately, just another nigger.” I dread the thought of having this conversation, but I know that if I want to see my son healthy and alive, it is one I will have to have.
It terrifies me to know that no matter how hard my husband and I will work to make sure our children are protected; that our son is protected, we can’t protect him from the racist element of the world. We can only teach him how to try to survive it. It devastates me to no end that it won’t matter how great the family is my son comes from and how amazing of an individual he is, he will be reduced to a stereotypical image of a Black male who is considered to be a worthless human being. It breaks my heart that this will be my son’s reality and unfortunately, this will perhaps be his son’s reality.
via iammariellet.com
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